Ken Socrates - Ken Socrates is a self-described "Gonzo" journalist in the fierce style of Hunter S. Thompson but is widely regarded to have little of the latter's wild creativity and almost none of his writing ability. In his career he has been a travelling correspondent for such prestigious publications as Corn Farmer Monthy, The Scatalogical Art Review, Big Laffs 'R' Us and Screw! Magazine. He has amassed a body of work both profound and terrifying in its scope and magnitude.

He was born is a small New England fishing community called Hough's Neck and spent his boyhood days with one foot in salty seawater and one eye on the horizon. He earned his Journalism Degree from The University of Saskatchewan in Saskatoon and has been employed at various intervals in the past as a clam shucker, a rodeo clown, an amateur gynecologist and, briefly, as Ricardo Montalban's personal assistant. It is also rumoured that he was Malcom McLaren's first choice as the bassist in the original Sex Pistols line-up but was reportedly released when his personalty was deemed too unstable for the band.

He is the founding creator of this, The Ken Socrates World News Organization and supports, with an almost disturbing fervor, the viewpoints expressed within. His continuing efforts to illuminate and enlighten us are an inspirational, undying beacon of pure, shining hope.